The last few days have been glorious and as I sit here now I keep looking into the garden thinking just ten more minutes till there is no more sun left…
I have been trying to take things steady since Sunday and have laid off exercising properly. I have done some stretches and a little plank here or there with some squats thrown in for good measure.
I have been busily getting my house in order and preparing for trip… But this time it is a trip for fun not treatment. I’m a little bit excited. The Easter weekend is here and I am spending it with my man. My favourite person…
But even though things have been ticking along steadily there have been things nagging at me.
The pain in my side, I thought was healing. It is only by the time I go to bed that it really plays up. But yesterday I was in agony from about 6pm. It’s so debilitating and if this is a muscular injury, boy, I don’t want it again thank you very much! I don’t take pain relief usually as I would rather feel the pain and let it go naturally but last night I took 1000mg of paracetemol, 600mg of ibuprofen and 20mg of codeine. And even then the pain didn’t go fully. I did sleep though but awoke in pain again. Every deep breath and cough makes it hurt.
I noticed today though that the pain is directly under my mastectomy scar and it does feel tender to touch now, like it is muscle pain. But weird that it is right where the scar tissue is. Pete still thinks stress is a major factor. Its funny where we hold tension and he should know as his back goes almost every time we are due to go away.
But I guess that’s how the body manifests ‘stuff’. It’s trying to tell me something and I know what it is… patience! And that the Universe will guide me once it is good and ready…
Well I have been patient but I wasn’t going to wait for the Universe to present things to me so, in my impatience I decided that I would call Prof Dalgliesh. I had emailed loads and it seemed that I wasn’t getting heard. On calling I was met by Prof D’s secretary. She is very short with me on the phone and said, ‘Oh, you have been accepted’. What?! Yes, they have accepted you for the vaccination trial. Oh right, well thanks for informing me.
She proceeded to give me a few details of when it would start but I asked her to let me know as much as possible as I know nothing about it. She said I may be starting on the 1st may. She did try to get it on the 24th but they are too busy. She said that even though it’s a trial and should be free because it is administered at eth London Clinic they would be charging me for every visit. She wasn’t sure of costs but would find out. She do you know anything about the trial? No! Oh, haven’t you had a patient brochure sent? Well who was going to send it to me? Anyway that has now arrived.
I asked about ablation. She said flatly that she doesn’t deal with that. Well who does? She said they should be contacting me. How? By email, letter, phone? And who would be contacting me? I again explained that I have no idea what’s going on and someone needs to help.
Once I received the patient brochure I emailed her to thank her for her time and explained that my brain was going to pop with anxiety and stress if someone didn’t help me. I got a reply saying she would email the consultant. I then got a further email to say that the consultant is away until the 22nd April… FFS. Well at least I know.
So good news I think! Well at least we are getting there. i still feel uneasy and lots of loose ends but surely this is good right?
Apparently the vaccinations will be every two weeks, then if I tolerate that well every month and so on. I will post the information regarding the vaccine once I have digested the information.
It’s funny because I am reading Pam Grouts book, E Squared and in it the first exercise is to ask the Universe for a gift within 48 hours. This is to prove that the Field of Potentiality, Source, God or whatever, exists. I asked yesterday at 12.55pm. OK, so I had to chase the gift but I got it didn’t I? So just over 24hours isn’t bad at all eh?
One more thing… I actually have a bit of a sun tan…. I love the sun!