Friday night was expected.. a battle to watch Comic relief and trying to stay awake. I managed to stay awake until 10pm and must have cried at every heart wrenching vt they showed. I have to admit there are times when I just think to myself.. what sort of world do we live in? It’s so cruel in so many ways. It’s hard to understand what it’s all about?! And there is where that thought has to stop because if we really start going there then the whole will to live just drops off the face of the earth.
Saturday was a brilliant day. I did some ‘therapy’ and got all creative practising a wedding make up on my best friend. (It went very well, even if I do say so myself) Pete became the usual excited host and presented us with cocktails and champagne. So much for not drinking but I always feel that it’s rude to decline and actually it goes back to the ten point plan.. A little of what you want is good for you. (I keep telling myself this at weekends!) Let’s face it, I have reduced my alcohol intake massively compared to what I used to drink and it goes in fits and starts as to the amount I do drink. Pete and I did feel decidedly drunk and watching England play Wales at rugby didn’t help.. Boo. (England step up!)That said the day after the night before we are increasingly starting the day by saying we don’t need alcohol any more. It doesn’t have the same effect it did years ago. Maybe we have got old? Or maybe we have just found there are other ways to feel really good. Either way, it’s progress.
Anyway, back to going to bed early. I had the best night sleep on Friday night. I slept about 10 hours and having had no alcohol. I am convinced that this helps my slumber. I felt amazing on Saturday morning and before Liz arrived for some female (and Bear) bonding I did all my rituals and got stuck into my new DVD of yoga. I have mentioned her, Tara Styles, before but as there are 4 DVDs in the package I am having a new experience every time. I am still finding it hard to think of yoga as exercise, but if all the yogis and yoga enthusiasts are anything to go by then yoga is definitely enough exercise.
Pete made me a brilliant smoothie for me that morning. I am finding that juicing is turning my stomach at the moment. I don’t think it is the veggies that I use I think it is more the supplements powders that turn me more green than normal. Pete’s smoothie consisted of avocado, spinach, apple, dates, ginger and nut milk with flaxseed in it. I added all my powders too. It was very tasty! Having a smoothie is great alternative to a juice. I don’t usually have fruits and I did find it a tad sweet but in the nature of having some fruits with their peel/kinds on I know that the sugars get broken down differently to when they are purely just the fruit. This is what the dietician told me.
Sunday we awoke to a blizzard. A snow blizzard. The weather is freaky again and so we decided to do some retail therapy. Well I didn’t expect anything but it was a perk of the trip to be taken to my old friend Karen Millen. Big smiles!
The weekend was full of lots of cuddles from my Bear and we spent yesterday afternoon just snuffled together watching Harry Potter and eating a great creation that Pete made from spinach, tomatoes, cod, and more.. mmmmmm. Seriously I am cat! Give me warmth, cuddles, a soft place to sleep and food and I am totally made up!
My sleep wasn’t great last night and I am finding I am waking up with aching ribs and back still. In fact I got myself into a tizzy last night before sleep as my whole side was hurting. The one thing with canSer is that the every new thing or ache makes you think the worst. It’s going to be hard to ever change that especially as time is of the essence. I know for sure that if you do not speak up even if you think you are being neurotic that canSer can creep up on you and catch you off guard. Now there is a fine line between being real and being totally mad. I am pleased to say that this morning my back did ache a bit but my ribs didn’t.
Maybe I was worrying last night as I had been emailing the lady I mentioned on Friday, Helen who is also writing a blog and raising money for charity since her sister in law has canSer. Another hero in my book. Helen emailed me and gave me more info as to why she has embarked on the charity drive. Her sister in law was 29 years old when she started her roller coaster. She is now 33 and ‘it’ is in her bones, spine, stomach, and lungs. God it makes me sick. I don’t want anyone else to be going through this. I know that her sister in law, also a Clare, is in pain. It’s so hard having any condition, disease, or illness. For anyone thinking about ill health the worst is feeling in pain. I can’t imagine what it must feel like physically or mentally. Or rather I don’t want to imagine that. The thought of things is much worse than actually experiencing them… well in most cases. I am getting to know Helen and as she is going to be organising a charity ball in Oxford I am defo on her side and will be getting bodies there and hopefully getting raffle prizes and doing anything I can. Working together only seems natural. And she is a local girl. All I think right now is what can we do for Clare, Helens sister in law? I need to know what treatment she is having and maybe I can point her in the right direction. Start with alleviating symptoms, helping her spirit and then let’s get cracking at getting her some special treatment. It then led me to read in ‘What the Doctors don’t tell you’ and article titled, ‘Immune system is best cancer fighter, ‘milestone’ research confirms’. It states a healthy immune system is the best way to beat cancer. In fact the ‘war on cancer’ will never be won if we solely rely on chemotherapy, say researchers in a new report hailed as ‘ a milestone of cancer research’.
A research team from the Eberhard Karls University in Tubingen, Germany, has demonstrated and proved that the immune system has the capability to drive tumours and cancerous cells into a state of permanent dormancy. This means that immunotherapy is an effective cancer therapy and it does so without destroying cells, say the researchers, led by Prof Dr med Martin Rocken. Instead it causes senescence, or lifelong dormancy, in cancer cells and stops the cancer spreading.
OK so what jumps out of that article.. Germany.. again! Well that only makes feel more confident in what we are doing. With another round (round 3) of immunotherapy coming up I just hope this little trickster of a canSer stops too!
After I got all my chores done today I have sat for a few hours making more bracelets as requested by the ‘bracelets elves’. Another 100 red heart bracelets have been made and already packed to go their sellers. I never expected for them to be so popular and I am still having people email saying they have friends in other parts of the country willing to circulate them for me too. I have also been asked by the Cancer Vaccine Institute if they can sell them in their shop.. Ok so maybe I need to get some more printing of the cards done and get my tushy on the floor to make a proper load more! Whoda thunk it eh? My little bracelets… Makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.
This week ahead is exciting. I’m working tomorrow and then off to my mum’s for some proper girly time together. I didn’t get to see her on Mother’s Day so it is only right I visit her and let her look after me! Haha!